Oh baby!

So. It's been a long week. I've puked all over town, fallen asleep at work, and heard the baby's heartbeat. HOLY CRAP.

I had my first official doctors appointment on Thursday. It took me approximately 45 minutes to pee in a cup. Yep. Talk about a shy bladder. Once I FINALLY squeezed out some urine, they immediately took me back to the room with a big CONGRATS! My doctor came in beaming, so excited, and ready to chat. We talked through all the, what I assume to be normal, things. Symptoms. Problems. Expectations.

They were able to squeeze us in with the sonographer too, so we were able to see and hear the baby that same day. Puking the last 5 weeks, being so tired I can't hold my head up, hearing the doc say congrats did not feel real. As soon as I heard the heartbeat, it was there. Real. Actual. And boy, did the tears start falling. Even sweet Bob teared up a little. The sonographer printed some pictures for us, and then I went out to do the pre-screening blood tests for genetic disorders. They haven't taken that much blood from me since the mysterious elbow incident of 2010.

So anyway. We have a baby. Growing and making it's Mama super crazy sick. Hank also seems to be aware of it's presence. He's now resting his head on my belly when we sit together, and it's super sweet.

For now, meet our March baby!

A crying jig. Or twelve.

So. The hormones are raging, and the tears are falling. Every single freaking thing causes me to cry. Commercials. Songs. Thoughts... Every thing.

The most frequent bringer-oner of tears... thinking of how I'll tell my Daddy that I'm pregnant. My poor Daddy has been waiting soooo long for a grandkid. As as I sit here crying, I realize how proud I am to be able to give him one.

I've arranged for him to pick me up from the airport when I go home in a couple weeks. If I don't tell him immediately, I don't know if I will be able to wait until we get back to the g'rents house (30 minutes away). I certainly can't tell him while he's driving... Dude would probably run off the road. So then do I tell him at the airport or wait and tell he and the g'rents all together? Gah!

Mom already knows, I had to tell her to get her input on morning sickness. She had it for 9 long months with my Brother Little. I knew she'd have some good suggestions for me. So anyway. It's soooo hard not to share with everyone yet!

I go to the doctor the day after tomorrow. Squeeeeee!!

Salty lemons.

I've always been a fan of lemons. The saltier the better, in my opinion. And right now, I'm craving salty lemons. When I was a kid, my parents used to get so mad at me for eating them, citing harm to my teeth as the reason behind their aggravation. I think it was really because I was eating them and they wanted them. Anyway. I've been inhaling lemons and tomatoes, with salt, of course. I don't know what that means exactly, but I'm anticipating elevated blood pressure during this pregnancy. I've GOT to get my salt cravings under control. Asap.

So this week is our first doctors appointment. I would have already gone in, between Bob's work schedule and Dr. J's maternity leave, it's been a nightmare. Doc returns to work Monday and Bob comes home on Wednesday. So Thursday, we'll go in and check this little nugget out on an ultrasound. I'm pretty pumped about it! I'm ready. I think.

I'll just say- I adore my doctor. I've only seen her once before, last year at my check up, but she was so awesome. When I saw her last year, it was after a long summer of funerals, a wedding, a cross country move, and getting used to Bob being gone all the time. To say I was in a bad place mentally would be an understatement. During my appointment, she just talked to me. As a friend. As a person. We spent 20 minutes just chatting about anything and everything. She immediately made me feel comfortable. I'd never had a female gynecologist before, which I told her, so she made it all super easy and open. I'm excited to experience this with her!

Smelly melly.

I've always had a pretty sensitive sense of smell. But now, I can smell anything and everything. And it's awful. Even the mention of smells sends me running to the toilet.

It's not just smells. The mention of things I don't like make my stomach churn immediately. My poor co-worker mentioned applesauce this morning and I lost my ritz crackers in the office garbage can.

After the last two weeks, this kid could be one and done. It'll take me a long time to forget this misery. I just hope this doesn't last past the first trimester... Good lord. Bleh.

The remedies.

So. I drove to work this morning, via two parking lots. In which I threw up. I walked into work, told my boss I was experiencing day long morning sickness, and came back home. Once life stopped spinning, I went to CVS and bought out the entire aisle of nausea aids. The best thing so far? Sea sickness bracelets. Score. Big time. I recommend.

But I figured if all else failed, at least I had Reese's cups. Those always work in any situation. I've had 5 so far today, all while wearing my awesome and stylish new wristbands!

Morning my ass.

So. Morning sickness is no joke. All day "morning" sickness is just plain wrong. I have cravings for food, but when it comes down to it, it all makes me sick. Bleh.

Like the cheesefries the other night- bleh. And the unopened bags of steak fingers in the freezer- bleh. And the Publix fried chicken that we purchase by the bucket- bleh.

For now, it's ritz crackers, ginger chews, and ginger ale. So gourmet

The search for steak... fingers.

So. When I was in elementary school, we had the most kick ass lunch menu ever. It was so good, that I still think about it. Often. It was a set menu every day, with sandwiches if you wanted that instead. Every day we had the choice of a hamburger, a ham and cheese sandwich, or a barbeque sandwich, and fries.

Monday we had chicken fingers and fries. Tuesday was a pizza pocket, corn chips, and cheese dip (which I've searched for ever since). Wednesday was fried fish filets and fries. Thursday was steak fingers, and you guessed it... fries. I don't remember what was Friday, which means it was something I didn't eat. So I had a ham and cheese and fries.

So the steak fingers... Any time I see them in the store, I buy them. Today I've been craving them, but I couldn't find them in my local grocery store. Or any of them. However, I FINALLY FOUND THEM! I went to four different stores, and finally found them at Publix. They won't taste exactly the same, but it'll be close enough. And I can't wait! But first- dinner tonight is Outback. I actually want food. Cheesefries and a cesar salad. Mmmmmmmm.

I'm taking my Mother's advice- if there's something you will actually eat- eat it. And often.

Holy nausea, Batman!

So. Guess what you shouldn't do? Fly to Maine, while pregnant, and experiencing ridiculous morning sickness. Every seafood sign, every lobster roll, every crab shack, every mention of non-beef related items made me queasy. Bleh. Literally. Then throw in a crazy bumpy flight (or two) and you have one insanely green pregnant lady.

On an uplifting note, I found some ginger chews at Trader Joes tonight and they're helping. Thank gawd. My diet has consisted of tums, ritz crackers, and ginger ale, and I'm still sickly. Then add in the exhaustion... it's exhausting. Literally.

I've heard that these are signs of a healthy pregnancy, so I'm totally okay with it. I'd rather be sick and tired and have a healthy baby than whatever the alternative is.

Three is a pretty big deal.

So. Three. Tres. Trois.

One. Two. Three. As in Bob and I, plus a baby, will make three.

Or three positive pregnancy tests means we'll be the THREE GUY'S instead of two shortly... OH MY GOD.

So yeah. Guess who's pregnant?! After knowing for 4 whole hours, I realize how nearly impossible it will be for me to keep this quiet for 8 more weeks. If my math is correct, I'm only four weeks pregnant right now. I have made my first doctors appointment, August 15, which will be around the 8 week mark.

Today has been a day of crazy emotions. Every single time I start to think about the fact that I'm pregnant, I start crying. I'm growing a baby. Holy crap. This is the single most important thing I have ever done in my life. I never thought I would feel this way. I never thought I would be this excited or nervous or ready. I never thought I'd be so emotional about this tiny human that is forming inside me. But then again, I've never been pregnant before. I never knew it would be like this.

Now comes the task of a) keeping myself as healthy as possible and b) picking out a way to tell everyone our good news (in 8 weeks). HOLY BALLS!!!!!!!!! I'M PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!

*(remember.... these posts were imported after the fact!)*

Party of one.

So I can't remember if this has been discussed or not...

Being the wife of a pilot is an often lonely life. Just like my birthday, Easter, and Memorial Day, I'll be alone on July 4. In years past, you'd find me hanging at some body of water, with a planned visit later to visit a very special birthday girl... my MP. This year, I'll be working. And will come home to an empty house.

Bob and I have been married for a little over a year, and I'm still not used to this lifestyle. Just when I think I am, I throw myself a pity party and regress a smidge. It doesn't help that Bob has been on an irregular schedule for the last 2 months. His training is over and now he's back at the airline with an extremely full schedule.

Sometimes I go back and forth between whether or not I want to be working right now. If I didn't have a job, I could go home and hang with the family, with no urgency (besides Bob and Hank) to come home to. I could take off to where ever (with unemployed BFF, Jess) and not feel guilty about leaving my patients. I fly off to meet Bob for long overnights in parts unknown.

Then I remember how much I adore my job. I think about how much it makes my life meaningful and and important. The things I do at work make a difference in my seniors lives. I think about how miserable I was last summer, unemployed and depressed, just sitting at home.


So tomorrow when you're enjoying family, friends, water, sand, hot dogs, and fireworks, think of me. At work. Making a difference, keeping my patients active and healthy. And then coming home for a pity party. Boo hoo.

One year.

It's been one year since four men were lost. Robbie, Paul, Ryan, and Joe. 

It's been one year since their families had to learn to live without them. 

It's been one year since Andy and Josh survived the crash that changed their lives forever. 

It's been one year of them trying to relearn how to be "normal" again.

It's been one year, but it seems like yesterday and a lifetime ago all at the same time. 

MAFFS 7 will always be remembered. 

Sappy Saturday.

Some days I realize just how lucky I am. Usually these are days when Bob is home. This morning, we walked Hank down to the waffle shop in our neighborhood, sat outside, and had a lovely breakfast.

This past week was our two year first-date-iversary. At this point, we've known each other for 11 years. We've been "together" for two, married for a little over one. We spent the week together, doing all the things we love.

When I stop to think about what we have with each other, I still get weepy. Sad, I know. We both acknowledge our joint sappiness frequently.

You always hear people say, "I married my best friend." They start dating and then become best friends. We became best friends and then got married. We truly have the very best of both worlds. Finally.

This concludes this edition of Sappy Saturday. 

Two way training.

So it's been ridiculously awesome to have Bob back home! I'm so happy his training is over. However, he's only home this week, and then he's gone again. I pretty much won't see him until our vacation at the end of July. I may get a day here or there, but that'll be it. It's going to suck, but at this point, I'm sadly kinda used to it.

This week while he's been home, I've noticed that he's pretty well trained. He likes to say that he's trained me, but I've also trained him. Usually before I go to sleep, I ask him to rub my back. It relaxes me and puts me close enough to sleep that I actually fall asleep shortly thereafter.

So one night this week, I asked, "Will you do me a favor?" His response was, "Roll over." I'd like him to just volunteer for the back rubbing, but I'm not complaining! I'm going to take full advantage of him being here.

Country Mouse, City Mouse.

So I grew up in the country. Our house was approximately 8 miles from Hometown, basically out in the sticks. I hated it more than anything while growing up, but now I can appreciate it.

Tonight, on the way to stalk our new house, I took the "country" roads and saw hundreds of lightning bugs. I adore lightning bugs. I was never one to catch them in a mason jar, because I thought that was mean. I have always preferred to see them out, in the air, lighting up, the way they're supposed to.

I like where our new house will be. In one direction, you can go back toward civilization, to Charlotte. In a couple of other directions, it's pretty remote. To the point you're not sure those living there have teeth or running water at home. But then a mile later, there's a Walgreens. It's weird. But I love it.

So the result of tonight's stalking trip...

Holy crap!! It's going up FAST!!

Happy Father's Day... TO ME.

So. Today is Father's Day. My Daddy and Pa are enjoying their Amazon gift card and pound cake (respectively) in Louisiana. Bob, being the sweet fella he is, went to see them this weekend, along with visiting his Aunt and Uncle. It sucks that he isn't here, but I'm glad he's able to see our families. Hopefully I'll get to see him next weekend. Maybe. (For Father's Day, Bob got a flask with a unicorn on it from the fuzzy butts, in case you're wondering.)

Anyway. With today being Father's Day and all, we knew grills would be on sale. Bob likes charcoal, I like gas. This will be an ongoing debate in our home for as long as we're together (kinda like Christmas decorations). We found a grill that combines both- gas on one side, charcoal on the other. But until we're sure what we'll want in the new house (built in outdoor kitchen or whatever), we aren't buying that one. I bought a different one instead. Today. For me.

A few months ago, I bought a baby table top grill from Target for $20. It suits me just fine, but Bob thinks it's dangerous and wants something bigger. For me. Since he hates gas. Makes sense huh?
Anyway, I've been on the hunt for a grown up, on sale, gas grill for the last week. I finally found one, and drove all over south Charlotte trying to find one 1.) in a box that 2.) wasn't damaged 3.) at a Lowes. Three Lowes stores later, I found one and purchased it. While in the check out line, I had the following conversation with the guy in line behind me:

Dude: Daddy wanted a grill, huh?
Me: NO. (pointing to myself) Mama wanted a grill.
Dude: Oh. So you're a single Mom?
Me: No.
Dude: But it's Father's Day...

Really? I can't just go buy myself a grill on Father's Day? People like this drive me crazy. I learned a long time ago not to assume anything or make judgements too soon. I'll judge the hell out of you once I know you, but not before. I'm just polite like that. Kidding. Kinda.

My Daily Homeless Encounter.

So. I go to several different facilities during the day. One of them is in the ghetto. I mean, straight up. Stray gun shots, broken down cars, and lots of foot traffic are normal. The facility is gated and  super nice. One block out of it though, is sketch city.

A couple of blocks away there is a really busy intersection that is a favorite spot for homeless people to beg. There's one guy who I see on pretty regular basis. I've tried to offer him granola bars, but he turns them down, despite the sign he holds saying he's hungry.

Today, knowing I had nothing to offer him, I just played on my phone while sitting at the red light. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him standing outside my window, gesturing wildly, trying to get my attention. I rolled down my window and this was our conversation:

Me: Yes, sir?

Him: You STILL texin'? (I'm assuming he said this, because I grabbed my phone and looked down as soon as my car stopped rolling.)

Me: Yes. I am.

Him: You idiot. Stop textin' and drivin'.

Me: I'm STOPPED AT A RED LIGHT...not driving.

At which point the light turned and I drove away as he flipped me off. It makes me want to avoid that intersection from now on. I mean, if you won't accept the food I offer you, don't harass me for sitting peacefully at the red light.

Myrtle.

One of my very best friends, Fertile Myrtle, reminded me today of her pregnancies. She has two adorable little guys (my "nephews") and she has not had one single bit of trouble conceiving. She got off the pill and was pregnant before she even had a period. Twice. Bitch. Kidding. Kinda.

It was so easy for Myrtle, but I have other friends who spent years trying, miscarrying, and trying again. The thought of a miscarriage scares the crap out of me, which is why no one will know I'm pregnant until the 12 weeks mark AT THE EARLIEST. As I get older, the threat scares me even more.

I'm also afraid of the possibility of multiples. I'm going to be an old(er) mom AND twins run in my family. Yikes. Not that I wouldn't love to have two babies, it's just that my body won't like me if I try to carry two babies at once. I have a whole host of health issues that will be complicated by twins. Hell, they'll be more complicated with ONE baby at a time.

Getting pregnant.

So. Here it is. 

Bob and I are officially trying to have a baby. I went off birth control 30 days ago today. We aren't telling anyone, which is possibly the hardest thing ever to keep quiet. And if/when I do get pregnant, holy balls! How am I going to keep that private? I'm usually an open book... I mean WIDE open.

I have a pretty big issue when I hear someone is under 12 weeks pregnant and they're telling everyone. I've had too many friends who have suffered miscarriages. I can't even imagine going through that myself, much less having to deal with having to tell other people I lost a baby. It just seems to devastating.

As of now, I haven't started my period yet. According to the Triage Nurse at my gynie's office, this is normal, especially considering that I took my birth control pills continuously (for over a year) so I wouldn't have a period. Life is funny that way. I've spent years not wanting a period and now, I'm impatiently waiting to start one.

So far, I've taken 4 pregnancy tests in the last month. Each time I've taken one, it's been a let down. Even Bob has gotten excited about anticipating the results. We need to just slow down, take life as it comes, and patiently make a baby. As the triage nurse today said, "No pressure and don't stress, but have as much sex as humanly possible all the time." Mmkay. I'll get right on that as soon as I get my husband back in town!!

*(Disclaimer- all pregnancy related posts have been imported and added after the fact!)*

It's got good bones.

Soooo. The pins came out. Holy balls. It was awful. There's a video of it on YouTube, courtesy of Bob. I haven't watched it yet, but I sent it to a guy friend today who proclaimed, "That's some seriously awesome shit!" So naturally, I can't wait to watch it... Not. But my foot is somewhat healed. The bones are where they're supposed to be, leaning the direction they were meant to, and I don't have permanent metal keeping them that way (unlike my right foot).

Now I'm stuck nursing a dried, cracked, swollen, oozy foot. You barf yet? Yeah. I have. My foot is that gross. Bleh. This poor mangled thing is in need of some serious attention, which I am happy to give, especially considering Bob left again today to go back to training. Boo. And again, if you're reading this and you need this surgery, let me know if you wanna see pics. I have weekly updates from both surgeries.

I actually have a pretty exciting weekend planned, and I'm already looking forward to it. A friend from work is hosting a Thirty-One party, which appears to be right up my alley. I also have shopping planned with my girls... One girl is going shoe shopping with me to find shoes that I can actually wear (starting next week!!). The other girlfriend is house accessory/furniture shopping with me. She just moved into a new house and we'll be in ours soon. Hopefully. I'm going to go ahead and start sale shopping for accessories so I don't have to purchase everything at once. It'll be bad enough with all the furniture we have to buy...

Speaking of houses... ours was framed today! We have vertical boards that resemble the walls. WOO HOO!!!!!

 

Sadly, our friends are already picking out "their" bedrooms. And even worse, they will each have their own. We may have picked a floor plan much too large for the two of us. Oh well. Guess we'll need to start having some babies to fill all those bedrooms. 

Boot be gone!

Sooo. Guess who gets out of a boot in less than 2 weeks? THIS GIRL! I'm super crazy excited. My pins come out on Monday, and then I'm in the boot until the doc is comfy with me walking without it, which I estimate to be two weeks. Mainly because I'm not wearing this damn thing any longer, whether he agrees or not. Screw you, doc.

Bob is coming home from training this weekend so he can be here for my pin removal on Monday. I get a smidge queasy and fainty in these situations. I'd rather him be there than just a friend. Not that my Charlotte friends aren't amazing... I'd just prefer my Bob there.

I went out to see him last weekend. We've done a pretty good job of seeing each other on weekends. He's traveled here more than I traveled there, but that's to be expected considering the boot situation. Although the experience was pretty pleasant last week. I have to say, airport peeps go above and beyond for those physically impaired. Or at least they did for me. It was a cluster to actually get to the airport, but once there, it was all smooth sailing... flying.

-I had a lighter suitcase. I can't wear a lot of pants unless the legs roll up over the boot, so I packed only dresses. I also only had to pack one shoe per pair, which saved a lot of space and weight.
-I was able to hitch a Skycap ride and not look like a lazy asshole. It was amazing. We left out of E terminal in Charlotte, which is the furthest from civilization. The walk would have been horrendous... I'd STILL be walking.
-I was able to upgrade to first class. More room equals easier sitting with the boot.
-Free booze in first class paired with a Tramadol made it a pretty sweet flight.
-At every turn, someone was asking if they could help.

Bob suggested I keep the boot handy and use it every time I travel. I'm not sure I could do that, but it sure did make traveling a lot easier.